


Remember I AM you

by PurpleMockingbird



Category: Evil Regals, Once Upon A Time - Fandom, SwanQueen - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Slow Burn, swanqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-17
Packaged: 2018-06-08 21:20:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6873781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurpleMockingbird/pseuds/PurpleMockingbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post Season 5 Finale: When the Evil Queen tries to get into Reginas head by threatening Emma, Regina realizes that her weaknesses must also be the Evil Queens.<br/>As vengeful Zeus comes to Storybrooke to punish our heroes for the death of his brother, Regina must reunite with the part of her personality that is the Evil Queen - but for that the Evil Queen must agree to do so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

When the Evil Queen first shows herself in Storybrooke no one is more surprised or terrified than Regina. The evening when it happens, she has dinner at the Charmings. Snow had made it a weekly thing a while ago. Whether it is to keep her from getting lonely without Robin or because she finally feels 100% comfortable around her, now that the Evil Queen is gone completely - she doesn’t know.  
It pains her a little – the smiles on the street and little conversations that she has at Grannys with what seems to be random inhabitants of the town. No one had treated her like this when the Evil Queen was still inside her.  
  
Yes, she had saved them many times, and everyone saw the efforts she made to redeem herself but the primal fear that the Evil Queen had evoked in the towns inhabitants was always present. That pain bothers her – she shouldn’t mind that people are more comfortable with her now. Hell, she is more comfortable with herself now.  
  
But when the dark purple smoke appears and a forgotten mirror image of herself steps into the Charmings apartment the first thing she does besides conjuring a fire ball is feeling relief – that is what terrifies her. That, and of course the fact that her alter ego is sporting her most devilish grin.  
Regina understands immediately why she has chosen this specific time to show up. Snow White her old nemesis and Regina her new one are in the same room, friends, betraying what was such a big part of the Evil Queens existence back then – the mutual hate her step daughter and she had for each other. Regina remembers vividly that hate. When she first separated from the Evil Queen she had thought that the memories of her emotions and worst actions would disappear, but they never did. Not much has changed within her at all– only the people around her changed in their mood towards her.

“Surprised to see me?” the Evil Queen asks, still with that grin on her face. Snow and Charming don’t answer, just stare – so does Regina. “Not in the mood for a chat? I’m glad – I always hated your voice, Snow White.”  
At that Charming moves warningly in front of his wife, shielding her.  
“Still always the hero, how boringly predictable. Anyways – I am only here to let you know that I have come back to take what is mine... I did build this town, didn’t I?”  
The Evil Queen gives a short wink towards Regina and is gone as fast as she had appeared.

The evening continues as would be expected. They call Emma, make sure Henry is fine and soon the Charmings apartment is base of an unofficial council. Zelena, Emma, Hook, the dwarves, Granny, and even Gold, one by one join the three of them. Neil is still at Mother Superiors, and as soon as Henry arrives he is sent there to watch him – at least that’s what Regina says when she explains to Henry why he has to go join them at the heavily guarded compound of the sisters.

Since Emma stepped into the apartment her eyes haven’t left Regina. She is trying to figure out what the woman must be feeling right now. When she gives Henry a little smile and kisses him on the cheek, Emma smiles too.  
When the last of the dwarves arrive Hook is the one to speak up. “So, the Evil Queen is back? Is she?” he looks pointedly at Regina – as if she wasn’t as surprised as everyone else in this room.  
“That seems to be the case” is the answer he gets from her.  
“But how is that possible? Emma and I saw you rip her heart out, Regina!” Snow states the obvious.  
“How isn’t important right now” Emma steps in “what is important is to find out what she wants? Besides her town back – what does that even mean?”  
“Well, it bloody sure doesn’t mean she’ll run for mayor!” Hook throws in – helpful as ever.  
Everyone is silent for a few seconds. No one knows what to say, they all don’t know what she meant. The silence is broken by Charming who does what Regina knew everyone else was either too much of a coward or too close of a friend to her to do.  
“Regina, I know this isn’t you anymore” he starts, trying to convey that this isn’t an accusation - a tone they all had taken on when the Evil Queen was still part of Regina, in order to not stirr her awake, “but she was part of you. What do you think she will do?”  
All heads turn to Regina who had kept herself in a corner and in silence. Emma looks like she is physically hurting because of the question Regina was just asked – as if somehow she knew that it hurt her to think of that time, to imagine herself in the Evil Queens shoes now – that that must be terrifying for her.  
Regina takes a little bit of solace from that, straightens up, head high “Well, there are only so many things that stand between her and having power over this town. I assume she will start by taking whatever or whoever that is down - which means you and Snow and all the other heroes in this room should be careful. What is different to back in the Enchanted Forest is that she knows you now - she will use that against you.”  
“That’s not the only thing that’s different – we have Swan, she’s the savior, she has defeated you before!” Hook says.  
“Technically, I broke the curse, yes but back then Regina and I never fought with magic, I have no idea whether I can take her or not.”  
Emma looks from Killian to Regina while she’s saying that – her eyes are asking another question ‘Do you think I could take you in a fight?’ and as Regina holds her gaze, she shrinks with her shoulders, almost imperceptibly. A conversation had without the knowledge of the others in the room.  
Then Regina shakes her head “And we won’t have to find out. I will take care of this. You all should just take cover in the meanwhile. Protecting Neil, Robyn and Henry will be your main objective.” She sounds a little like the general of an army, like the leader of knights or, Emma realizes, like a queen but she pushes the random thought away and counters “You couldn’t kill her before - I’m not letting you do this alone again!”  
“I don’t think you will have a choice, Emma.” And with that Regina disappears in a cloud of purple and Emma is left, as so often before, staring at an empty spot.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina comes head to head with the Evil Queen, worries about the Charmings and is a little sleep deprived....

The next time Emma sees Regina again is in the middle of the town square standing across from the Evil Queen. She zeroes in on Regina, the way she always does when the other is in danger and starts running towards her, Snow, Charming and Hook in tow.  
When Regina spots her she holds up her hand to signal her to stop, and she does. Emma trusts Regina can handle herself. The Evil Queen isn’t the only queen on this street. Regina still had that commanding aura to her.  
  
They are close enough now to hear the conversation between the alter egos.  
“So, you have come to take me down, have you? I don’t know how you expect to do that – you are weak without me. I was all that protected you. You would have fallen apart without me after Daniel. Let’s see how you will do now.”  
Emma feels something yanking her forward, an invisible rope constricting her airway, her magic drains from her body.  
  
“I know you care for her more than you let on – remember I AM you. Try anything and I will snap her neck!”  
Emma is gasping for air, Hook is yelling, Snow and Charming are looking at their daughter in fear and Regina lowers her voice, holds her hands up. She emphasizes every word meticulously, says it slowly, as if to a child: “If you ever were a part of me, you will let her go.”  
  
The Evil Queen just smiles that unsettling smile again “Forget it!”  
  
And just as instinctively as Regina knew why the Evil Queen came to the Charmings apartment that day, she knows now that she won’t hurt Emma. After all she had been that woman for a long time, and that woman has lived within her for as long as she had known Emma Swan, so she conjures a fire ball and fires. The Evil Queen disappears before one can hit her but Emma falls to her knees, free to breathe again. Snow is all over her, holding her face, making sure she is fine but she spots a glimpse of Regina just standing there in the square, visibly gulping. Her face is pensive, calculating, as if she was planning a chess move.  
  
“Regina, what was that?!” Snow nearly shouts. Her love for her daughter is bigger than the fear of hurting Regina by questioning her judgement. “She could have killed Emma!”  
Regina looks at Emma her eyes softening for a second only to move on to Snow and with a cool collected tone she says something that strikes both Snow and Emma as cryptic “You forget- she really is me.” The purple smoke envelopes Regina and she is gone. 

When deciding where to go, Regina takes under consideration that all the spots she would regroup at, are also the Evil Queens spots - the mayors office, the vault, the mansion, Emmas car - so she decides to transport herself to a random spot in the woods.  
Regina knows now, for sure, what she had suspected all along. The Evil Queen who was a part of her when she met Henry and then later Emma, had a connection to them, just like she has. Even in her darkest days in the Enchanted Forest she had love for her father and was hurt by her mothers actions –things she would have never admitted back then and she is sure the Evil Queen doesn’t right now but she knows even in her darkest days she wouldn’t have hurt Emma. She is more worried about the Charmings. The Evil Queen has far more history with them than her reformed self has.  
  
The complex feelings that she has for Emma Swan are not relevant right now, and easily pushed out of her thoughts, like so often before. This was a crisis situation and all that mattered was keeping people safe and since she already knew that her family is safe, it is for her friends and the inhabitants of this town that she worries now. That thought stopped her in her tracks for a second – since when did she count Emma to be her family? But again – it didn’t matter. She still had to find a way to stop the Evil Queen, whether Emma was in danger or not.

The next days are spent with the Charmings, Emma, Hook and Zelena researching in the town library on how to defeat a persons evil alter ego. Potions are made and deemed failures, books are considered helpful until they are discovered not to be, strategies are spun by everyone in the town short of the sleeping dwarf but nothing seems to be halting the Evil Queen. She has taken on terrorizing normal town folk, always a step ahead, already gone when Regina and Emma arrive. She stops by Zelenas and offers her a partnership – which would have worried Regina but the Evil Queen makes the mistake to surprise Zelena next to her sleeping daughter and is deemed a threat by her. Apparently empathy isn’t the Evil Queens strong suit otherwise she would have known that that couldn’t go well.  
  
One evening, everyone is either sleeping, their heads laying on the books they were supposed to read or protecting their children at Mother Superiors. Everyone but Regina and Emma. Emma hasn’t seen her take a break in days and it has her worried, so she approaches carefully, settling down next to Regina. She looks for an in to start a conversation, so she leans over and peaks into what Regina is reading, shoulders and knees brushing Reginas, and for the first time in days she feels content and for a second Emma Swan stops worrying and also reading.  
After a few minutes Regina puts the book down, pulling Emma out of the train of random thoughts her tired brain had been on.  
“You should go to bed.” Regina says and Emma doesn’t know which part of Reginas voice wins - the command or the worry but they are definitely both struggling to be heard.  
Emma smiles tiredly “Funny, I came over here to tell you the same thing.” Regina answers with a smile herself. Emma realizes, it’s a little bit brighter than before the Evil Queen was separated from her. For a second Emma is surprised by how much attention she had been paying when it comes to Reginas smiles, but now that she is thinking of it – and she really only is because she is tired and her brain has stopped censoring itself – Regina has a nice smile, but she doesn’t smile that often but then again, Emma has realized quite a while ago that next to Henry it is her that Regina is smiling at the most. Thinking about it Emma is filled by a weird feeling of maybe pride, warmth, comfort. It must have shown on her face because Regina lets out a little snort of a laugh and wants to know what she was thinking about just then. Emma of course just brushes it off and tells her that even heroes need to sleep.  
  
“It doesn’t seem like there is anything useful in this book anyways” Regina says, looking up from the book again, after having ignored Emmas plea for her to go to bed minutes ago. Emma had just sat there, knee still brushing Reginas and staring into the void – something Emma does when she is tired, Regina knows.  
Looking at Emma her frustration of not finding anything useful only grows because right now she can’t be sure that the Charmings, Emmas parents, wouldn’t be killed by her alter ego any minute.  
She hadn’t realized the extend of her emotions but the book she had just put down went up in flames and Emma was raddled out of her day dreaming, using her own magic to put out the fire. She looks a little shocked, as if someone had just woken her with a loud noise. When she looks at Regina her gaze is soft though and she puts her hand on Reginas arm, a calming gesture, that grounds Regina more than she was willing to admit.  
  
“I know this must be difficult for you, but burning down the library or passing out from sleep deprivation will not take the Evil Queen down either. Go to bed, Regina.” And Regina definitely hears more worry than she does command in it. Emma gets up from her chair and holds out her hand for Regina, who takes it – both of them apparently too sleep deprived already to realize how openly intimate their looks and touches are. After helping Regina up, Emma uses her magic to transport them to her apartment. That seems to strike Regina as a little odd and as an answer to her questioning look, Emma tells her that she really didn’t want to run into the Evil Queen at the mansion.  
  
Emma ushers Regina to the sofa and goes to put on some hot cocoa. When she enters the room again, Regina is passed out on the couch. Emma just stands there for a second, minute, minutes, she doesn’t know. Again she wishes she would know what was going on in Reginas head. After, however long she was standing there, she puts a blanket over Regina and wonders for a second why she would have such a powerful urge to brush Reginas hair out of her face. She resists, more confused by it than anything else and makes her way to her bedroom.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new antagonist makes an appearance - a fight ensues.

The next morning is different than one would expect but Regina doesn’t know that – she never had a close friend like Emma before – it doesn’t strike her as odd to feel the warmth that she feels when she sees Emma making coffee for them in her kitchen, or that she doesn’t want to give back the Pullover Emma has given to her, that she catches Emma Swans scent off of it, and that it makes her feel at home.  
  
Emma on the other hand is confused for both of them. She is more content than she has been in a long time, handing Regina her coffee and having light, what seemed to be unimportant conversation with her. It’s not about Evil Queens, magic or someones dark side – it’s about Henrys school project and how Regina likes Ethiopian coffee more than any other and Emma doesn’t know where the difference is.  
  
The confusion comes after Regina has transported herself out of Emmas apartment, leaving the Pullover behind. It starts when Emma blushes thinking of Regina arriving without a top on where ever she appears next. She shakes her head, questioning her sanity for a second. But she doesn’t have much time to indulge in her new found lunacy because only moments later Hook turns up at her door step.  
  
She greets him only slightly distracted but makes up for by laughing at a joke he makes. The feeling of content is gone. She feels like she always does – a little misunderstood, like a part of her is missing and she asks herself whether True Love really is the most powerful magic. But she backtracks, puts all of those highly philosophical thoughts out of her mind. She loves Hook. He is a sweet guy, and they have been through a lot – why question that now? 

  


After cleaning up at the Mansion, Regina makes her way to Granny’s where she assumes everyone will be at and she sees her sister outside, waiting for her.  
“God, if I have to spend one more morning eating with those do-gooder-idiots I will murder someone.” Zelena says and Regina can’t stop herself from chuckling a little.  
“I think you won’t have much of a choice – if it takes a town to keep Robyn safe, a town she gets”   
  
Regina winks at her sister as she starts walking towards the diner but they don’t get far before the earth starts to shake and lighting strikes directly in front of them, blinding them temporarily.  
  
Regina holds out to take her sisters hand in order to keep her close. This doesn’t feel like it’s an attack by the Evil Queen. ‘Lightning is not really my style’ Regina thinks and is a little shocked of how easily she identifies with the Evil Queen.  
  
Their eyes adjust to the bright light and they realize it didn’t come from lightning.  
A man stands in front of them. He seems young, petite, clad in a white Toga but through his skin it seems like all of his body is emanating light. Aside from that he doesn’t seem happy.  
The Charmings, Emma and Hook come running out of Granny’s, apparently on a quest to investigate what is going on and they stop in their tracks.  
  
The man is not an inch taller than Regina, his frame seems lanky so the voice that seems to echo from the sky, deep and threatening is a surprise on its own.  
“My brother is dead! I am here to punish whoever has dared laying a hand on him!”  
  
Lightning might not be her style but Regina has put a whole world into a dark purple storm, she knows how to make an entrance and she isn’t intimidated that easily.  
“Like hell you do.” And the first fireball finds his way, colliding with his chest. He stumbles, only a step back – his skin is not broken.  
  
He grins, an evil grin – ‘Family resemblance’ Regina thinks, shuddering inside, remembering the smiles Hades used to send her sisters way.  
It’s not a second later when three more fire balls are fired but the only thing they seem to be doing is putting a step of distance more between them and that mysterious man.  
‘That will do’, Regina decides and conjures another one, when his voice appears again, this time louder – like the roaring of a storm “ENOUGH!” and the fire ball dies in her hand her magic being suppressed by something bigger than her “I AM ZEUS, GOD OF THE GODS”.  
  
He stops abruptly when a white stream of magic hits him from the side – apparently Emma has pulled herself out of the state of shock she was in, and isn’t quite as easily intimidated either.  
Zeus seems to have enough of earthlings trying to kill him and the next thing Regina sees is a lightning bolt, wild and crackling loudly appearing in his hand when Zeus raises his arm to the sky. He seems to be hold sheer power in his hands. Her only instinct is to get to Emma, whom she assumes is his target now, but her feet cannot move, just like her magic can’t.  
  
He pulls his arm back, ready to throw the bolt of magic and electricity directly towards Emma – and so he does.  
  
Regina sees it all in slow motion, the bolt making its way to Emma who doesn’t even have time to look shocked, it happens all too fast. Regina struggles to do something but there is no getting free of the magic she is bound by.  
Only a microsecond before Emma is hit by lightning, the bolt is not even a meter from her now – purple smoke appears in front of her and the figure that steps out of it conjures a magical shield, that is hit by the bolt only a moment later.  
  
Zeus, for a god, looks pretty dumb and surprised. He turns to look at Regina with wide eyes because the woman that had just blocked his attack looks exactly like the woman he had just bound by magic. So much unexpected resistance must have been too much for him and he retreats when lightning strikes the ground he is standing on.

  


Silence takes hold of the little crowd. Regina looks at her mirror image but she doesn’t fall into a fighting stance –this part of her just saved Emma, she realizes, as she stares at the her alter ego who only stares back at her –not even an evil grin on her features.  
  
Emma eyes the situation, shocked, probably a little pale – what had just happened? She hadn’t even realized completely that Zeus had attacked her and now the Evil Queen is standing in front, having saved her. Instinctively her eyes seek out Reginas. She is breathing heavily from the fight, an unidentifiable look on her face. But they hold eachothers gaze for long moments. The Evil Queen walks towards Regina nods a little and in her stride disappears in a purple cloud.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hook might have a revelation in this chapter. Emma and Regina are tasked with saving everyone once again.  
> This one is more talk, less action.

Hook isn’t blind and if there is one true thing about him, it’s that he loves Emma. Two things that evoke rather contradicting feelings, as he watches the scene unfold in front of him. 

He is more than glad that Emma is okay, that she was shielded but it doesn’t quite make sense to him that the Evil Queen would be on their side. 

He knits his eyebrows together as he hugs Emma and keeps pondering until he realizes –the Evil Queen hadn’t been helping them – she was saving Emma specifically. Suddenly all of it makes sense, why Regina knew the Evil Queen wouldn’t hurt Emma. Even the evilest of all are not immune to love. He would have never had that revelation if he didn’t know from experience. For him too, Emma was why he first became an honorable man, a hero – back in the day there wasn’t much difference between him and the Evil Queen now. The realization hits him and he can’t quite believe it. He eyes Regina in order to assess his suspicions. She doesn’t make a move to hug Emma like he nearly expected but she just stands there looking confusedly at his girlfriend who is currently hugging Snow White. 

The thought disturbs him – he doesn’t want to think about competition, he has never questioned the love that Emma has for him and Reginas or the Evil Queens suspected feelings wouldn’t make a difference in their relationship anyways. As if to confirm all of that, he moves again to hug Emma and kisses her on the temple. Whatever those thoughts were, they are soon forgotten.

 

Another unofficial town council meeting is held – this time at Granny’s over an obscene amount of pancakes. The fact that the Evil Queen showed up and helped them, seems to go widely unnoticed. Apparently the shining god, spitting thunderous threats stole the show. A thing Regina is quite grateful for.

Everyone is still a little bit rattled and it doesn’t take long until Grumpy suggests to give up Zelena to Zeus.

“I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t owe that green witch nothing! If he wants her, he can have her!”

“Oh, but if you wish for me to rip your heart out so badly, you could have just said something.” Comes in a mocking tone from an amused Zelena. 

Regina shoots her a look, but of course she stands behind her sister, and after all she only did what she did in order to safe Regina.  
Snow, the heroine she is, of course already shuts Grumpy down. Regina is glad that she doesn’t have to be the one to reason with the dwarf. 

She is just going through all their options when she tunes into Snows speech about heroism, soon enough to hear her pose a serious question “…but Grumpy is right, we do need a plan. How do you think we can defeat him? He is a god after all.”  
And as always when it comes to important questions like this everyone looks to either her or Emma for guidance. 

Emma looks pensive, with that serious expression that she clearly inherited from her father. Regina always thought on him it looked a little overly dramatic but for some reason she doesn’t think the same about Emma. She could have watched the blonde think for a long time. She shakes her head at that thought, reprimanding herself for not staying with her head on the task. 

 

After a short silence, Emma turns to look at Regina “Think we can take him?” Regina nearly grins because that would be quite a fun thing to try if there wasn’t so much at stake.  
“I guess we’ll have to find out, savior” she says, a little challenge in her voice, and walks out of Granny’s. 

She needs some fresh air, and the endless questions by the town folk are a little bit too much for her to handle right now. Even with the Evil Queen gone she has found that she doesn’t have much patience for people who can’t form a rational thought on their own. Another thing she had expected to change after their separation.

 

She feels like she is having a déjà vu for the umpteenth time, when she hears the door of Granny’s open and close and steps follow her down the little path to the street. She hears her own name in Emmas voice ring in her ears before anyone even says anything. To her surprise it’s not Emma who calls out her name but a male voice – Hook. 

Now she knows if the Evil Queen would still be inside her, she would have conjured up a fire ball just in case, because she just does not trust the pirate. Her new self – consciously –decides that, that wouldn’t be very appropriate so she just turns around and pulls up an eyebrow – stating a question without using words. 

“I’ve researched my fair share of magic – you don’t have your full powers, do you?” 

The question surprises Regina – it’s true but that the pirate would come to that much magical insight on his own was interesting to Regina.  
She doesn’t say anything but her eyebrow was still pulled up as if to compel him to tell her what that had to do with the situation they were in. 

For an observer the scene must have looked quite amusing – two brooding, in black leather clad people, who don’t really have a way with words staring at eachother. 

Of course Hook gives in first and says “I assume that means yes. So that means the rest of your powers are the Evil Queens now?” 

Regina nods, giving him a look that someone would give a student after they understood the simple concept of something.  
Regina hasn’t said a word in that conversation but her level of annoyance rises with every second that the pirate doesn’t tell her why he is asking her all of these questions.

“So together, the two of you and Emma would stand a better chance against Zeus?” 

Regina was just about to actually reply to him when the door opens and a quite confused Emma looks at them questioningly. Not talking seems to be something they all had in common.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hook confronts Regina, Gold makes a powerplay and Regina must admit something to herself, in order to save everyone she loves.

“Hook here told me that we should maybe consider bringing the Evil Queen into our fight against Zeus.”  
Apparently Regina did speak, Hook realized, just not to him and more to Emma. He wasn’t surprised. 

  


“Do you think that might work? I mean, she did save me from Zeus – maybe she wants him gone just as much as we do.”  
And apparently he is completely ignored by Emma as well. She seems to be very focused on Regina, whose eyebrows were knitted together telling him that she was considering their options.  
  
Good – that is what he came out here to do – make her think about it.  
  
It did bug him a little though, that he could just walk away now and both women would probably not even realize it. A little out of spite for that he decided to throw in his opinion.  
“I don’t know what the Evil Queen wants but I think you should give it a shot, Regina. That power that you are missing is within the Evil Queen now – it could make a vital difference.” 

  


“What power? Regina?” Emma was more than surprised. Why hadn’t she heard of this before? And above all – why did her boyfriend know more about Reginas situation than she did? 

The overall set up of this conversation bothered her and it seemed to show because Regina gave her an apologetic look and started explaining how her powers were becoming weaker ever since she had separated from the Evil Queen. She didn’t think that she would lose them completely though.

  


Emma and Regina had left Hook behind a few minutes ago were walking towards the Mansion considering their options.  
  
Could they just go and ask for help? Would that be the right approach?  
  
Emma started listing reasons for the Evil Queen to consider helping them but Regina knew that the only way the Evil Queen would work with them was if she felt she had to, in order to protect her family.  
  
They passed by Golds shop and the Dark One stepped out to join them – obviously a power play telling them that he knew exactly where they were and what they were talking about.  
It was all displays of power and evil grins from Rumpelstilzchen these days. 

  


“I see you have realized you will not defeat a god with half of your powers, have you, Regina?”  
“What do you want, Gold?” Emma was annoyed by his presence.  
“I, dearie, am here to offer you a deal. A valuable piece of information that might decide whether you survive your encounter with Zeus or not. The price is a favor from both of you. I always wanted the dream team working for me” he said sounding more and more like the Dark One with his trademark high pitched, mocking voice.

  


“I know better than to make deals with you, Rumple. There is nothing worth giving up our souls for.” Regina answered.  
  
“BUT it wouldn’t be just any favor – it would be an honorable one – helping me wake up Belle, once I’ve found a way to do so.” His voice made it sound more dishonorable than the actual words would have suggested. “I will give you a little hint – you are right about something, but you don’t know the whole truth.” He snickered. He enjoyed talking in riddles, making them question every move they made. 

  


“Fine, I’ll do it. But leave Emma out of this.”  
“Na na na, dearie, not an option.”  
“I’m in – saving Belle is on my list anyways” Emma stated matter of factly, gesturing Gold to give up the information, not giving Regina time to argue about it.  
  
“Perfect. Now listen carefully: In order for you to get your full magic back all of you must be united and fighting for the same cause. Only if you believe with ALL of your heart that you can defeat a god, you will defeat him.” He looked like he had just revealed the Holy Grail, his fingers playing in the air, he waited for their response.  
  
“That was your piece of valuable information? Well, I want a refund, Dark One – those are not really ground breaking news” Regina stated a little mockingly.  
  
“And again you misunderstand – you must reunite with the Evil Queen by merging again – and you both must do so willingly. Your heart is in two places right now, Regina. You cannot believe with a heart torn in two!”

  


He disappeared, leaving Emma and Regina behind.  
Emma had her eyes trained on Reginas. She couldn’t ask her to merge with her evil self again. Not when she had just willingly ridded herself of it. The protectiveness Emma was feeling, was so familiar, she didn’t even realize that she had balled her hands into fists and her heart rate had climbed.  
  
The look on Emmas face could only be described as puppy-dog eyes. She seemed extremely reprehensive on having to ask Regina to do this and the openly displayed care for her together with the intense way she looked at her made Reginas heart flutter in a way only dreams of very old memories usually did.  
  
Some things just can’t be ignored Regina realized. She cared for Emma Swan – more than she had for anyone ever since Daniel died. And even though in Reginas book that would be a bad thing every step of the way – right now it might be the only way to get what they needed to protect everyone from Zeus.

  


The admission Regina had just made to herself, had been easier than expected – apparently you can’t really keep yourself from knowing that you care for a person.  
Still staring into Emmas eyes she says, voice even “I have an idea where I might find her – I will go and talk to her” and with that she steps away from Emma and transports herself to a very specific well in the woods.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Evil Queen battles with her own emotions and Emma makes a life changing discovery!

The first time Regina saved Emmas life was at that fountain. She had done it even though most of her was still acting like the Evil Queen. She had done it thinking it was for Henry but the weird feeling of relief when she saw Emma Swan crawl out of that fountain was already confusing back then.  
Of course she hadn’t thought about it much but now she remembers. She had saved Emma Swan because she, the Evil Queen, had wanted her to live. 

It turns out her instincts were right. In the shadows under the leaves of the trees she saw herself, dressed in her old clothes, standing there, probably just as confused as she had been the first time fate had brought her upon that well.  
Regina was angry at the person in front of her, was afraid but more than anything the thoughts of her past had made her realize that she was part of her, whether she liked it or not. She had been there when she found incredible love for her son, when she fell for Emma and before that she had made her strong. She really was what had kept her alive all those years in the Enchanted Forest. But it was not only strength that the Evil Queen represented in her, it was also weakness. With her, she could have never admitted what she felt for Emma. Love was a risk the Evil Queen wasn’t ready to take and it was her quest now – to change that! 

The Evil Queen turned around, apple in her hand. All she saw in the woman before her was weakness, a woman who had never gotten what she wanted, unable to protect herself or the people she cared for, unable to take revenge for what people had done to her, letting them treat her however they pleased, out of what? Guilt? She knew that all she did was what she had to do. She survived! She had gotten revenge! She had found her true love in her son! The woman before her, would have died before she even met Daniel if it weren’t for her. She would have broken under the strict command of her mother, had she not had that spark of rebellion that the Evil Queen had brought into play even back then!  
“Have you come to die, Regina? Finally realized that the life you are leading isn’t really worth it, have you?” the maleficent voice matched the Evil Queens wicked smile and the way she turned her head slightly, as a predator would, looking at its prey. 

Not raddled at all Regina states “No, I have come to talk… About Emma Swan!”  
The Evil Queens eyes grow weary at the mention of the name. The woman she couldn’t get out of her head, the woman whose safety she couldn’t stop considering in her plans – no matter how hard she tried.  
“We both know she will be the one to face the god.” Regina let the statement sink in.  
“And why would I care about that, Regina? She is your pet friend? Protect her if you must – I will wait with killing you till after.”  
“It’s not just me who wants to protect her – or have you forgotten? You were willing you trade your life for hers just this morning!”  
A laugh escapes the Evil Queens blood red lips but Regina continues “You couldn’t have known that that shield would hold. I didn’t, so how would you?”  
It apparently hit too close to the truth because the only answer Regina gets is a fireball thrown at her. The protective shield she conjures, stops its progress. The two mirror images are circling each other now – like wild lions would, muscles tense, eyes sharp, showing teeth, an offer to attack. Regina has her shield up as soon as the Evil Queen fires. Both know the other must realize that they could do this till the end of time – they are one –they cannot beat each other.  
Regina yells over the sound of the fire balls colliding with her shield “She means just as much to you as she does to me! The only way we can defeat Zeus is by joining again! We must be one in order to succeed in a fight!”  
At that the Evil Queen falls out of fighting stance, the fire ball dying in her hand, she starts to laugh –an unkind, evil sound that makes Regina cringe.  
“If you think for a moment that I would merge back with you and live the pathetic life I have within you for that woman, you must be even more delusional than I realized! Let her die! Gods speed, Regina – may you die with her!” and with that the Evil Queen disappears.  
Regina stands in the middle of the clearing, realizing that the Evil Queen, she herself, had just given her a prophecy of death that she won’t be able to evade. 

  


Not even 100 meters from where she is standing Emma Swans heart is beating out of her chest, her ears are ringing and her brain is spinning. The words she just heard shouldn’t but do make sense to her. Memory after memory appears. Memories of Regina saving her, being there for her, listening, smiling, the feeling of content, the mutual understanding.  
She had only followed Regina to make sure she was okay but when the Evil Queen attacked she was already frozen in place. She couldn’t have come out of her hiding spot if she wanted – what would that mean? If she had shown herself? What of all the questions that would have to be answered? What of her feelings that she didn’t know how to voice? What of Killian?  
She stays in her hiding spot until Regina is gone. Her brain has already started rationalizing, filtering, self-censoring. Reginas feelings can’t be that deep if one whole half of her doesn’t have them. Reginas feelings don’t change a thing about Emmas. Reginas feelings must be ignored. Nothing easier than that if there is a god seeking vengeance. There are plans to be made and plan Bs to be considered. She pulls her jacket on more tightly – the armor reminds her that she is the savior, all confusion must be secondary if she wants to safe the people of Story Brooke.

  


When she sees Emma Swan step out of her hiding spot, something constricts in her dark heart. Tears of frustration fall from her eyes and she swears that her world will be a better one with this emotional distraction out of it! The Evil Queen situated at a nearby hill, turns around and wishes for her heart to be still.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epic show down and the last big chapter of this story.

The next time Emma sees Regina, she cannot keep her eyes off of her. She realizes that, that has become quite a habit. Every time Regina is nearby, she has Emmas full attention. Until that day Emma never questioned why. And even though she can’t stop herself from doing so now, she is trying very hard to focus on her quest.  
A spell that Henry had found in the library should be focused on, revised, tested – but all she can do is watch Regina move through the room. Grace and strength emanating from her.  
When Regina had told Emma that the Evil Queen didn’t agree, not offering an explanation as to why that was the case, Emma didn’t pressure her. She made sure no one else did neither.  
Hook had been insistent on Regina trying again but Emma stopped him, before he had gotten a fire ball for dinner. 

Hook – her thoughts circulate around him as well. Why did this revelation change so much? Why could she not look at Killian now as she had a few hours ago? Now she looks at him and what she feels is mainly guilt, disappointment with herself, with ‘true love’ – why couldn’t she just be happy with him? The universe seemed to tell her he was the one but that’s not how she felt.  
And at that, her thought process stopped. She couldn’t, wouldn’t keep going. Wouldn’t think of who might be the one for her.

So she focusses on Henrys spell, on training with Snow or David. Regina she avoids. In the three days following the offering of an alliance to the Evil Queen, Emma Swan leaves every time Regina comes into the same room as she does.  
A fact that doesn’t go unnoticed. Not by Regina, who seems to accept her new fate without question and not by Killian who shoots her random looks and asks her if she wants to tell him something two nights in a row. 

On the fourth day storm clouds form something similar to a massive castle directly above town square. Wild winds from more directions than a compass knows are rattling at the clock tower above the library. Every howling of the wind, every thunder sounds like another threat. A reminder that they are mere humans trying to battle a god.  
Their paths meet directly in the eye of the storm – town square. Regina left Zelena with her daughter, Neil and Henry. Emma has her family and Merida in tow.

Regina had realized the extend of the threat as soon as the god had tried to strike with lightning, but seeing this with her own eyes had her terrified. For a second she wishes the Evil Queen was still within her –not just because of the bigger chances of success they would have but because of that fearless, reckless streak that someone has who has already lost and done it all.  
Her head is held high, her eyes seek Emmas and for the first time in what seems like an eternity she holds her gaze. Strong, kind eyes, green like the forest calm her. Her son is in good hands, she doesn’t have to be afraid for him. This battle ends either with Zeus defeated or herself dead.  
As soon as she realized that the Evil Queen was probably right about them dying, she had consciously made the decision that should the battle take a turn for the worse, she would confess to the god, what she hasn’t done – kill Hades. With this thought her hands still and so does her heart. An overshadowing calmness befalls her when she realizes that Emma and Henry will be okay.  
It must be showing because Emma gives her a smile that she returns. They look like two people preparing to do a heist in Emmas world or taking over a kingdom in Reginas – pre-battle excitement has them both hyped on adrenalin. 

Of course, Gold appears again – that man couldn’t keep away from his best pupil even if his life depended on it. His word of advice echoes in their ears long after: “Remember – the way to defeat a god is to believe that it is possible with all of your heart.”  
Both Regina and Emma are prepared for that. Their research at the library had already days ago shown that the ancient gods told the peoples they had ruled that they were invincible because their belief had fueled the gods power. 

The expected bright light strikes in front of them, but it is not only Zeus lean figure that appears when it dims but there are five men standing behind him.  
They do not shine like the god but their weapons are glowing – one orange for the fire that will burn you if it strikes, one green for the poison that will kill you if it strikes, one blue for the ice that will cover you if it strikes and one red for the fear it bestows in your heart if it strikes.  
It seems not only Regina and Emma are going to fight today.  
Easily they all fall into fight stance – they have done this before one too many times. Charming draws his sword while Snow and Merida aim their arrows, Hook readies his daggers to throw, when out of nowhere the dwarves arrive. The small figures are barely recognizable, armed to their teeth with war paint around their eyes.  
Regina had never been as happy to see a dwarf as that day. At least her friends would not be outnumbered.

The gods voice rings in their ears and overpowers any thought “I AM HERE TO BRING HONOR TO MY BROTHERS DEATH. THE DEAD WILL BE AVENGED!”  
At that his warriors storm towards the heroes who are already starting a counter attack.  
  
Regina looks at Emma and the red and white magic streams that they produce hit the god without warning. He stretches his arms to the sides and two bolts of lightning and magic appear in his hands. Regina and Emma form a shield – one holding up the magical barrier while the other fires counterattacks towards the god. Zeus doesn’t seem very fazed, but both Emma and Regina become less strong with time. Holding off that much magic is draining their powers faster than expected. The shield won’t hold for long and just as it was about to break, a glowing orange weapon strikes the god! Charming had defeated one of the warriors and uses his magical weapon now in order to buy his daughter some time!  
  
During this brief moment of distraction –one that the god is able to deal with very quickly by knocking Charming out – Zeus does not see the purple smoke appearing next to his magical assailants.  
He does not see the look the Evil Queen sends Emmas way, the words that she says to Regina, that will echo in Emmas ears during long nights in the future: “Seems like I AM you”. She grabs Reginas right hand into hers and murmurs a spell. Their bodies are finished merging when Zeus turns around to launch what he believes will be one last fatal attack. But faster than before and stronger than before two streams of magic keep his arms restrained, no way of summing his lightning bolts. With both Emmas and Reginas whole hearts finally fueling their magic the god starts shining more and more from the inside until a bright light and the loudest thunder from above, blind the heroes temporarily and then it’s silent, the light is gone, and silver ashes fall to ground.


	8. Final Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this is more of an open ending but it's set up for Swanqueen to work out.  
> Next chapter will be an alternative ending that is a little bit more dramatic but also more a definitive Happy Ending.  
> Let me know which ending you prefer :)

Regina looks around. It seems like she is seeing different colors than she did this morning. She sees the divine warriors defeated on the ground, their weapons ashes like the god they had just beaten.

A smile appears on her lips as she looks at Emma, who is smiling at her as well. Regina starts to laugh and it might just sound a little bit like the Evil Queens laugh which has the heroes stopping in their tracks for a second.  
They eye her – who is she? The Evil Queen or Regina? Who is in control? 

It’s only a split second before Merida has her arrow trained on Regina.

It takes Emma a little longer to realize what just happened but early enough to see Reginas face fall and then see it contort into the angry mask that has in the past few weeks been the face of the Evil Queen.  
She steps next to her, delicately slipping her hand into Reginas, looking her straight in the eye - she sees nothing but love, Evil Queen or not. She lets go a second later in order to move in front of the woman, shielding her.


	9. Final Chapter - Alternative Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this ending first but felt like it was a little too dramatic. Swanqueen gets their Happy Ending served up on a silver platter though.  
> Let me know which ending you prefer ;)

Regina looks around. It seems like she is seeing different colors than she did this morning. She sees the divine warriors defeated on the ground, their weapons ashes like the god they had just beaten.

A smile appears on her lips as she looks at Emma, who is smiling at her as well. Regina starts to laugh and it might just sound a little bit like the Evil Queens laugh which has the heroes stopping in their tracks for a second.   
They eye her – who is she? The Evil Queen or Regina? Who is in control? 

It’s only a split second before Merida has her arrow trained on Regina. Reginas face falls but anger takes over and bubbles up to the surface and the daggers that her eyes are throwing, could have killed someone. She doesn’t see the dwarf with the other arrow pointing at her so when she conjures a fire ball – and she expects Merida to understand it as the warning - she is hit by his arrow.

Emma doesn’t know what’s happening. It hasn’t even been a minute since they brought down a god, and she started smiling at Regina, something she thinks she couldn’t stop doing even if she wanted to, only for someone to point an arrow at and shoot Regina. It had happened too fast, she had been too distracted all she can do now is catch her, breaking her fall to the ground. She holds Regina close, her arms envelop Reginas frame and she starts murmuring spells, her face buried in Reginas neck. 

Regina will open her eyes soon, only to find Emma looking at her from above, tears in her eyes, saying her name over and over again only to kiss her, in town square, in front of everyone:  
consequences be damned! alter egoes be damned! History be damned! Universe be damned!  
 

**Author's Note:**

> First fan fiction  
> http://imhereforthetvshows.tumblr.com/


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